On Keeping Up with the Kardashians this week, the theme was all about life and death. Actually, the tone was more about passing away rather than living and rejoicing to the fullest. OK, the whole deal was a bit macabre. Well, most of it.
Certainly, Kris Jenner's obsession about planning for her departure from this earth, coupled with the departure of her entire family, was definitely on the gloomy side. After talking to her mom, MJ, about where her dad is buried and finding out there is a bit more room there but not enough for everyone in the Jenner-Kardashian family, she looks elsewhere by visiting a cemetery.
She also tries out caskets (literally!) while her kids look on and wince. The woman has gone mad, with Bruce Jenner doing his usual thing: Taking her ideas in stride and telling her he doesn't care what she does when he's dead because, well, he'll be dead.
One thing learned while watching this episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians is that caskets are not made with men as tall as Lamar Odom in mind. He would need a special order should he plan on getting the casket of his choice. Meanwhile, Kris' pick is one done in black laguer (like a piano) with a semi-precious trim. Yes, she wants a designer casket.
Meanwhile, as far as fish stories go, Kim and Khloe start a good one when they buy two little goldfish for Mason as his first pets. Kourtney and Scott aren't thrilled, with Kourt explaining that she isn't ready for pets and doesn't really like them because, well, they often die too soon, like her dog did when she and Kim were kids.
Sadly, one of the fish dies almost immediately and so Kourney has to go out and buy another one. She wants to match the dead fish with a living fish so Mason, who is two, won't realize that his little Pebbles died. In fact, she takes a picture of the dead fish before it's flushed down the toilet (again, literally!) so she can show the pet shop owner and get another one just like it.
Another fish dies soon after that, and finally Bruce steps in to father Kourtney on how to teach youngsters about the concept of life and death. He suggests they get a book on the topic to deal with this matter. Then he instructs his step-daughter to say to Mason, "There is life. There is death. Fishies go to heaven." Although this may be a simplified version of what happens, it is a good way to pick up on a tough topic.
Meanwhile, Kim is upset with Kourtney since she has decided Khloe is the one who should be guardian for Mason should something happen to her. When the talk finally happens between the sisters, Khloe doesn't get why Kim is mad and kind of pushes the discussion to the side as she is want to do about a lot of hard discussions.
As for the fish, well, they are suddenly gone. Scott takes notice and asks about why this has happened and his girlfriend and mother to his kids says that the fish were just too hard to deal with and so, since Mason didn't seem to be paying attention to what was going on anyway, she simply got rid of them. Yes, Kourtney takes care of things the way she is used to dealing with excess baggage. She often clears out what she doesn't want or need at any particular time and then that's that.
Back with the Kris Jenner funeral obsession, now Kris is all about the flowers that she wants when death come knocking at the door. Rob is really taken aback, especially so as he looks at the picture of Kris trying out the coffin. She looks eery, to say the least.
With that, Khloe and Rob take lunch with Kris and the momager immediately orders a vodka while Khloe sips champagne. Rob calls his mom an alcoholic but Kris rationalizes that vodka contains less calories than other alcoholic refreshment.
But enough about drinking. Rob and Khloe are there to tell their mother they have had too much morbidity from her of late and that she has to stop her funeral obsession if only for their sake. Khloe says, "We really appreciate everything you're doing and that you want to have everything handled, but... it's not funny."
Both Rob and Khloe remind Kris that they have already had to deal with their dad dying and the whole idea about losing their mom is just too painful for the pair. When they use show-and-tell with the Kris by making her look at the casket shot, Kris finally succumbs to their wishes, making a proclamation that it's time to live in, well, "the here and now."
As for Kim, she's been upset long enough with Kourtney about her decision regarding Mason and his guardianship so she tells her sister how she feels about being left out. Kourtney says Kim's schedule is so full that she went ahead and chose their other sister. Still, Kourtney admits that Kim is a "great aunt" and that she knows that Mason loves to hang out with her. After softening the blow, she tells Kim that she would really like her to help with her finances should she need that assistance and Kim is suddenly right with the world, and her sister Kourt.
Meanwhile, in Malibu, Rob sets up a celebration of Kris Jenner's life instead of her death. He meets with her at a winery where her friends are there and where he has another surprise: It's a new tattoo of his mom to go with his other tattoo of his dad. Kris thinks this is sweet in a crazy sort of way.
And so there you have it: Another episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians. Stay tuned next week when Oprah comes to call on this wacky clan.